13 Characteristics of a Growing Church: Patience

Bad days happen. It's the truth, and it's a fact of life. We all have bad days. We all go through our own unique set of trials in life. We each suffer in our own way. Something that might be particularly trying for me--like going without air conditioning--might be no big deal for you. However, we all go through stuff in our lives.

We all have days like today where we just want to rip our hair out or throw ourselves down on the bed and cry until we can't possibly cry anymore. I know that in the week or so that we have been home from mission trip things have been trying for me and I have felt my own personal brand of suffering. People in the church just don't understand why the youth minister can't force the teenagers to come to church. I can encourage them and plan events that are exciting and hope to draw them in but I can't physically force them to come to church and sit through a worship service that may or may not appeal to them. I can't tell you how many times I have heard people say, "Where are the youth?" since we have been home. I don't know why but the first couple of weeks after mission trip are always the worst as far as youth attendance at church. I try my best to be patient but it isn't easy. I know this attendance slump will end and I won't have to hear the grumblings again until after mission trip next year but that doesn't make it much easier. So what should I do? That's what we are going to talk about today.

So here's a quick recap of the Characteristics of a Growing Church:
1st Love Genuinely
2nd Hate What is Evil
3rd Cling to What is Good
4th Devoted to One Another
5th Humility
6th Excitement
7th Stability
8th Service
9th Hope

The 10th characteristic of a growing Church is Patience in Affliction.
"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12 NIV

Ok, so I realize that listening to people complain because our youth group church attendance isn't as high as they like it isn't the most "afflicted" thing that people are dealing with out in the world, but it is an example that I can relate to right now. So like I said before, what should I do?

I think that Romans 12:12 makes it pretty clear that we are to be patient. Patience isn't really one of my strongest virtues. How about you? Things can get pretty rough. Life can be overwhelmingly hard. The last thing we want to do is be patient and the first thing that we want to do is panic, but we can't do that. To make a snap decision or change or to simply pack it up and move because things got hard is not necessarily God's will for you or me or our churches. God wants us to be patient as we go through these hard times and to trust Him to see us through. It's a tough thing to do. Fortunately, God never promised us that life as a Christian or as a church was going to be easy so we can't feel like He's been deceiving us on that one.

There's a reason that God tells us to trust in Him and not in OUR understandings (Proverbs 3:5-6). Basically the reason is because we CAN'T understand it. Our nature is not to be patient when we are going through something that is hard. We want a quick and easy fix that is going to make life easier! That's the whole reason that the "Easy Button" campaign for Staples works so well. We want things to go our way and we want it to go our way fast.

However, there are times in our lives that we need to go through affliction and suffering. In Romans 5:3-5 it says, "Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us." God uses the struggles and hard things in our lives and our churches to develop important characteristics in us. Without those times as reference points in our lives, how can we really enjoy and appreciate the great and amazing things that He does for us? I know it's hard, but this week I encourage you to try and be patient with whatever struggles you are going through. Look for God and for His bigger picture, and I will try to do the same.

More Resources:

13 Characteristics of a Growing Church: Hope

Hopes and dreams...our lives are full of them. We dream about the person that we are going to marry. We hope we will have children. We dream about the job that is going to make us happy and hopefully pay us well. We dream about going on the vacation of a lifetime. We hope to get that new car that is going to be oh so perfect for us.

These dreams push us to reach for something that is better and further than we are right now. They give us hope for the future, and they keep us going. If our hopes and dreams can do that for our personal lives then why can't they do the same for our churches?

So here's a quick recap of the Characteristics of a Growing Church:
1st Love Genuinely
2nd Hate What is Evil
3rd Cling to What is Good
4th Devoted to One Another
5th Humility
6th Excitement
7th Stability
8th Service

The 9th characteristic of a growing Church is Hope.
"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12 NIV

The lack of joyful hope in our churches makes me more than a little heartsick. Without joy and hope our churches die. They stop dreaming and making plans for the future. Without hope you begin to think that things can never be any better than they are right now so why bother. We stop dreaming about creating new programs, reaching new people, and bringing Christ to new areas. We get stagnant.

My wife, Christiana, works at a local baptist children's home. She works in their Public Relations department and works with the churches all the time. One of her main responsibility is managing promotional materials sent to the churches and the mailing list for those supplies. The other day she was telling me how depressing it was that she had just received phone calls from three separate churches who asked to be removed from the mailing list because the churches were closing their doors. What went wrong? Why are our churches dying?

I think it is in part because we have lost hope. We are too stuck in our rut of how we have always done things and we worry so much about our finances that we forget what is really important. We stop focusing on God. We stop reaching people and we start losing hope and getting depressed. Finally, we decide that it's just not worth the trouble anymore and people aren't coming anymore anyway so we close the doors. That's why our churches are dying.

It's time that we stopped worrying and started to hope and dream again! Something new is bound to surface. Something great is on the horizon. God can do anything in our churches! We have hope. We should be joyful in that. But it's a conscious choice that we have to choose to make everday. It isn't easy. It's going to be hard work, but I think it's going to be worth it. Don't you?

More Resources:

• "Love the LORD, all his faithful people! The LORD preserves those who are true to him, but the proud he pays back in full. Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the LORD." Psalm 31:23-24
• "We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name." Psalm 33:20-21
• "Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:30-31
• "We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, so that what you hope for may be fully realized." Hebrews 6:11

13 Characteristics of a Growing Church: Humility

I bet you know this person...everyone does. They always think that their ideas are the best. They know what is going to best for everyone, especially themself. They even have to top your stories because they know or have experienced more than you. You couldn't possibly be in pain because they are hurting more than you. All in all it's just about THEM. Conciously or not they are putting themselves ahead of every other person on the planet. That attitude isn't good for a friendship, a relationship, or a church. In fact, today we are going to talk about the exact opposite--humility!

So here's a quick recap of the Characteristics of a Growing Church:
1st Love Genuinely
2nd Hate What is Evil
3rd Cling to What is Good
4th Devoted to One Another

The 5th characteristic of a growing Church is Humility.
"Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:10b NIV

Too many times we get this false picture of humility stuck in our heads. We either equate humility with weakness and allowing ourselves to be walked all over or we think of false humility where we put ourselves down all the time and belittle our talents and strengths so that we actually draw more attention to those attributes. Neither of these ideas are a true picture of Biblical humility. So what is?

According to Romans 12:10, Biblical humility is the ability to honor others above yourself. That means putting others first. I do like how The Message words it when it says that we are to "practice playing second fiddle." When we are truly humble it isn't all about us, which allows it to be all about Christ and those around us.

In Proverbs 22:4 it says, "Humility is the fear of the LORD; its wages are riches and honor and life." There are two things I want us to get out of this #1 we are humble when we put God in His proper place in our lives and #2 our humility and obedience to God are rewarded and honored. In an ironic way, true humility is one of the most beneficial things that anyone could do for themselves.

When we are truly humble and allowing God His rightful rule in our lives then we will want to serve others and put them first. Jesus was the ultimate example of godly humility. Even though He was fully God He came down to earth and became fully man. He put our needs so far above His own that the Bible says He humbled himself and became obedient to death on the cross (Phil.2:6-8). He didn't have to do it. No one made Him. He simply put our eternal needs above His own physical well being. That's a humbling thought.

What can you do to be humble and put other's needs above your own?

More Resources:

13 Characteristics of a Growing Church: Cling to Good

I am constantly amazed at the shear quantity of horrible and stressful things that happen in the lives and ministry of those in the church--and it all happens in the name of God and ministry. Over the past few months I have had a youth ministry friend who has struggled with finding joy in his ministry and his church. Things are piling up all around him and the stress in mounting. Students are flaking on responsibilities while he is given new responsibilities almost daily. He is frustrated and overwhelmed and doesn't know what he should. Today we are going to talk about clinging to what is good. That is my friend's hope right now. He must cling to what is good for it is just as vital in a growing personal relationship with Christ as it is in a growing Church.

So here's a quick recap of the Characteristics of a Growing Church:
1st Love Genuinely
2nd Hate What is Evil

The 3rd characteristic of a growing Church is to Cling to What is Good.
"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good." Romans 12:9

There are several different ways that this verse is translated. I love what the ESV says...hold fast. When you cling to something or hold fast to it you basically have a death grip on whatever you are clinging to or holding on to. The key word here is "good". It won't do anything for you or for your church if you are clinging to your bitterness or anger or a dead program. You have to hold fast to what is good.

This same phrase is used in Psalm 63:8 when it says, "I cling to you; your right hand upholds me." Here the psalmist is talking about clinging to the ultimate good which is God. If we are going to have growing Christian lives and churchs then we should cling to God and His will for us and our church. Clinging to God means that sometimes we must let go of the other things that we have been holding on to for so long. Psalm 31:6 says, "I hate those who cling to worthless idols; as for me, I trust in the LORD."

The things that we are holding on to can be good in nature but if we are desperately holding on to them when God is telling us to let them go then they are what the verse calls "worthless idols" and they get in the way of holding on to God. These things that were "good" are now stumbling blocks in our growth and in our walk with Christ. Sadly that is what is wrong with many of our churches. We are dying because we are too busy holding on to the "good" things that we have always done instead of holding on to God. Sometimes we must let go of our ideas of what is good and our traditions so that we have our hands free to hold on to God.

More Resources:

13 Characteristics of a Growing Church: Hate Evil

Too many times as Christians we belive that we are better than other people or maybe we go too far to the other extreme that we always show love but we never stop to preach the truth of the gospel. Very rarely does God call us to live in either of these extremes. God is a god of balance and order. He doesn't want us to throw the baby out with the bath water but neither does He want us to allow wolves to live among our sheep. Last time, we talked about Love being the 1st Characteristic of a Growing Church. Today we will talk about the 2nd characteristic.

The 2nd characteristic of a growing Church is to Hate what is Evil.
"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good." Romans 12:9

Love and hate are on the opposite ends of the spectrum. They are--by their very natures--opposites. How can we love and hate at the same time? I think in this particular case it's pretty easy because God is telling us the same thing in two different ways. First He told us to have a genuine and accepting love for the people in our lives. Now He goes further to tell us to hate what is evil. We are to accept the sinner but NOT the sin.

This all goes back to what I was saying last time about meeting people where they are, loving them and meeting their needs, and then pointing them to Christ. At the end of the last Bible study I included a clip of Jesus meeting the woman at the well (John 4). Jesus knew before everything about this woman before she even approached. Instead of shunning her He talked to her and met her need. He took the time to tell her about the water of life. He didn't hate this woman, but He did hate the sin that He knew she was living in. After showing her love through his time and conversation then He pointed to the sin that she needed to get out her life.

Jesus showed the same love for a sinner and hate for sin when He had his feet washed by the woman who washed His feet with her tears (Luke 7:36-50). There are so many other examples in the Bible of this love for people and the hate of sin. I know that as people we often fall short of Jesus' example but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't at least try.

This week...meet people where they are, love them unconditionally, and point them away from their sin and to Jesus.



More Resources:

• Woman Caught in Adultery John 8:1-11
• Amos 5:15

13 Characteristics of a Growing Church: Love

This week I have been prepping to preach the Sunday morning and Sunday night services at Villebrook Baptist Church while my pastor recovers from surgery. While I was studying and praying, God laid it on my heart that I should talk about characteristics of a growing church as laid out in Romans. I don't want to give everything away before I preach but I will give you the first point in my 13 point sermon and then for the sake of attention spans, I will break the other 12 points out over the next few weeks. Hope that sounds good to you because that's the plan...so here you go...the sneak preview of my GIANT HUGE 13 Point Sermon...

The 1st Characteristic of a Growing Church is Love.
"Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good." Romans 12:9

In the English language, the word love is tossed about WAY to easily! We love pizza. We love going to the movies. We love our favorite sports team--Go Cards! But what does it mean to have a genuine love?

I don't want to go into a ton of detail here about all the different words for love in the Greek language (For more about the 4 Greek Words for Love, Click here to visit my wife's blog). Basically, unlike English the Greek language has several different words for love and each of these words have a unique meaning and usage. The word translated here as "love" is the Greek word "agape". Agape is an unconditionally, Christ-like love.

According to Romans 12:9 a growing church should have a genuine Christ-like, unconditional love. That means that we really have to love people where they are. We can't say "I love and accept you" with out mouths and let our actions show them differently. If you do you can gaurantee that those people will not bother coming to your church again. We are to hate the sin and love the sinner (Jude 1:22-24). When Christ was reaching out to people around Him, He didn't tell them how awful they were or how bad their lifestyle was. First, He met their need and showed them love. Then He told them to turn from their sins and from their ungodly lifestyle and they did.

That's what it means to have a Christ-like love!

A growing church meets sinners (every single one of us) where they are, shows them the unconditional love of Christ, and then through that love and relationship points them to Christ!

More Resources:

The Ebb and Flow of Student Ministry

Have you ever caught yourself saying, “It was going so well, but now our numbers have dropped. What happened?” Asking these questions is perfectly normal. It happens to just about every student minister (or pastor for that matter). This is what I call the ebb and flow of ministry.

Although everyone deals with the ebb and flow of ministry, I am going to deal specifically with student ministry. I will talk a little bit about why it happens and then I will suggest some of the best way that I know how to combat it. So let’s get started!

What causes a Student Ministry to Ebb?
Most of the time an ebbing or dwindling in the number of students in your ministry is a combination of a bunch of little things rather than one big event. Some of these things are unavoidable—like graduating senior going off to college. Some are common but should be combated—student’s who leave because of clicky teen groups or teen drama.

The last three reasons that a student ministry can ebb are the most heartbreaking:

1. Students can’t commit to coming to church on a regular basis or don’t like the conviction they feel when they are at church. So they quit.
2. Major conflict in the church and the whole family leaves. This could be conflict between two groups of parents or between the parents and the church staff or even between two groups of students. Whatever the situation, there may be students and possibly whole families who leave even if everything that can be done is done to resolve the situation.
3. Students get tired of the hypocritical behavior of the student minister and/or his family. Sadly, I have seen this happen before. Sometimes the student minister is the culprit and sometimes it’s his kids or both. It can be particularly hard on a youth group if the youth minister has teen kids who are angels at church but mean and malicious to students at school or in the community and the youth minister does nothing to stop it.

What can You do to Sustain the In-Flow of Students in your Ministry?
Yes, much of what we just talked about it out of your control. No, that doesn’t mean that you don’t have any effect on it or the outcome of the situation. We talked about three major reasons that students leave a student ministry so I want to talk about three of the best ways I know to bring students into a student ministry and to keep them there.

1. Teach the Word. Don’t be afraid to go deep. I was reading the statistics the other day and the student ministries who have the most retention of students and dedicated students are the one who are digging deep into the Word. You will still have the students that will show up once a month and you will have the ones who quit because this isn’t their cup of tea, but the students who are hungry for the Word will stay.
2. Encourage group unity and a place where students will be accepted. I dealt with a lot of rejection and being made fun because I have always been a big guy so I have a particular passion for making students feel accepted. We try to do activities where students are forced to mingle and get to know each other. I don’t allow students to call each other stupid or to make fun of what another student is wearing. If I hear it’s happening, I deal with it. I will go to the student responsible and talk to them. It’s hard and I am not always popular but it helps maintain the unity. The youth group maybe the only real family some of these students have.
3. Live what you Preach. Don’t expect students to do what you are not willing to do. If you don’t want them to cuss don’t cuss. If you want them to have higher entertainment standards don’t watch rated R movies or listen to music with inappropriate lyrics. If you want them to witness to their friends and bring them to church then you would be doing the same with students and with your adult friends too. If they don’t see you living up to the standards you are imposing on them then they won’t respect you and they won’t stay for long no matter how many Xbox 360s you might have in your youth room.

Post your ideas for maintaining a student ministry in the comment section. I would love to get feedback and new ideas. Share some with me below.